Lindsay McMahon
"The English Adventurer"
Aubrey Carter
"3 Keys IELTS Certified Coach"
Michelle Kaplan
"The New York Radio Girl"

Do you show love through words or actions?

Do you prefer to receive gifts or acts of service?

In this group English video conversation, Lindsay, Michelle, and Aubrey talk about the different love languages in today’s group conversation.

This is an unscripted and real-life conversation between native English speakers.

This is also a great topic to start a robust English conversation with native speakers.

Listen in and learn about today’s topic and get the opportunity to practice your listening skills for better English conversations.

What is Love Language?

Lindsay is excited to talk about today’s topic which is love languages.

The concept was introduced by Gary Chapman in his book “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts.”

We make fundamental mistakes with our loved ones because there is a mismatch in the way we show love and how we want to receive love.

This often happens with romantic partners but can also be seen with relationships between family members and friends.

We commonly give love in the way we want to receive it. This is sometimes a mistake.

Aubrey shared that learning about love languages has been helpful for her especially when expressing love to her children.

The way she shows love is not the same way her kids prefer to receive love.

This has caused problems for her in the past where they couldn’t recognize the way Aubrey was showing her love for them.

What are the 5 Love Languages?

Michelle hasn’t read the book but is familiar with the concept.

She has found this interesting and has been trying to apply this to her relationships as well.

Here are the 5 Love Languages:

  • Words of Affirmation. Words of affirmation are about expressing affection through spoken words, praise, or appreciation. Lindsay shares that this is her love language. She loves it when she receives praise and is given appreciation verbally.
  • Quality Time. Quality time is showing love and affection through providing the person with undivided attention. This is one of the love languages of Aubrey’s daughter. She loves just spending time with her family. It doesn’t have to be an extravagant experience. She appreciates taking the time to be with each other.
  • Physical Touch. A person with this love language feels loved through physical affection. This may be a big gesture for other people. An example of showing this type of language is through holding hands and hugging.
  • Acts of Service. Acts of service can also be commonly be called doing favors. A person feels loved and appreciated when someone does little things for them and often can be found doing these acts of service for others too. Aubrey feels so loved when others help her with tasks and thoughtful actions for her.
  • Receiving Gifts. This love language is basically giving gifts. The person with this love language treasures not only the gift but the effort and thoughtfulness placed into the gift.

Do You Know Your Love Language?

Aubrey says that one’s love language is both for receiving and showing love and it may not always be the same.

The way you show love may not be similar to how you show your affection to others.

It can also happen that you have more than one love language. It can be a combination of two or more.

Aubrey’s receiving love language is the Act of Service.

She feels so happy when one of her kids or her husband does the chores.

Receiving acts of service makes her feel so good that it is also the same way she shows her appreciation to others.

Aubrey’s Example

One of her children’s languages is Physical Touch.

She is not much of a hugger which is why it has created a problem for her in the past.

When she learned about the concept of love languages, this created a lightbulb moment for her.

This has helped her adjust to the different needs of her family members in receiving love.

Michelle’s Example

For Michelle, the language she likes to receive is Words of Affirmation.

Michelle is a language person, so she often uses her words to show her love and appreciation.

Her husband is the opposite. He doesn’t have the same way with words as Michelle.

Instead, her husband does a lot of acts of service which Michelle appreciates as well.

He would take care of their son and leave food for her.

Despite Michelle’s preference for receiving affection through words, her husband’s acts of service are just as good, especially when she has had a long day.

Lindsay’s Example

Lindsay’s preferred recipient of love is via Words of Affirmation.

Growing up her parents really valued verbal expression.

Lindsay’s partner is not really used to this.

There is a mismatch so on her end she takes the effort to understand and adjust to each other so there won’t be any problems.

Aubrey shared that Jessica once told her that her love language is Receiving Gifts.

She also appreciates taking the time and effort to find gifts for people she cares about.

Aubrey and Lindsay say that it is very hard to reciprocate the effort to someone who gives gifts.

They both don’t appreciate shopping, especially now it’s the holidays.

Lindsay still gets excited about preparing the gifts but she also feels stressed with the planning and actually going around malls buying gifts.

Takeaway

Learning about love languages is very important to sustain a healthy relationship with your loved ones.

It’s almost a science to adjust to how you show your affection.

Being more aware of the love language of others will not only give you a long relationship but improve it too.

It will strengthen your instinct in valuing your partner, family, and, friends.

The topic in today’s episode can easily be implemented right away.

You can strike up a conversation with your loved ones to better understand their love language.

This will definitely improve your talking and listening skills and bring up your confidence to be more comfortable speaking like a native English speaker.

This is also a great topic to start a conversation with a friend in English.

Try and read the book “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts” by Gary Chapman.

We’d love to hear your insights on this concept and how you’ve applied it to your own relationships.

Share everything in the comment section down below.

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